Its my Birthday!

Holy COW,

At this moment it is 3:49am on October 11th, my 36th Birthday.  I just listened to some of the most epic story telling, a sad and profound oration.  Recently I have taken to listening to audio books, many many hours listening.  I have a few feelings about it and want to share them with the one or two potential readers here.

A good writer does not make a good reader... I have listened to a lot of different books and have figured out that unless the writer is also a professional performer most often they shouldn't be reading their own books.  My grandfather was a great story teller, and an amusing writer, he read his own audio book and I have a deep appreciation for the work. However, I am sure having something remaining of him, the ability to hear his voice nearly 20 years after his passing, taints my perspective.  

Authors like Neil Gaiman are also good readers and writers.  While I appreciate his oration, I find that when professional readers perform a piece, the step away and performance add a great deal to the piece.  But... let writers like Steve Martin perform at the whim!

collection of links

I am intending this entry to be a way of sharing some links to conversations that I find amazing!

They are in no particular order... You might notice several of them are from TED.com if you haven't been to the site, stop reading this and go there now. Explore the site for a while and enjoy.

Mick Ebeling: The Invention that Unlocked a Locked-In Artist
Eye recognition technology on the cheep (free) that allows people to communicate and express themselves!

Roger Ebert: Remaking My Voice
Newest favorite quote: "We are born into a box of time and space, we use words and communication to brake out of it and to reach out to others"

Randy Pausch: Last lecture, Achieving Your Childhood Dreams
Just amazing and inspired.  This guy has some amazing advice, his approach toward life and living is uplifting to say the least.

Tim Minchin's Storm, a nine minute beat poem
This reminds me of Penn Jillette's This I believe essay only with rhythm and poetry... Oooh that will be next 

This I Believe: Penn Jillette
I have loved this ever since I heard it air, for those of you who have not had the pleasure of listening to the NPR series look it up, some great stuff in there!


This is of course to be expanded apon... gotta dig up some old links!

Gamma Girls Mockumentry

About a year ago I had the chance opportunity to work on a small film short, it was an odd yet fun experience and tonight I happened to run across it on the YouTubes.  I felt it was important to share my time!

Here is an article write up about it, somehow I was briefly quoted!


 

Living with fear on a daily basis

My wife and I live with fear on a daily basis, as I've mentioned before she has systemic stage four breast cancer that has metastasized to her brain and lungs.  So every day we give thanks for each passed minute she has "good health" and we plan for fun and adventure as much as are able.  She has suffered what are called Jacksonian Seizures as a result of pressure to her brain from the many tumors there so any time unusual muscle twitching, head aches, or severe anxiety occur our collective blood pressure rises and fear begins to muscle its way in to our lives...

Uusually every day or so, we have our moments of panic (to which I am apparently well adapted to) but otherwise we are such old hands at this that the day to day life we live is otherwise rich and rewarding.  Today was a test of our mettle as Katie had to go to the ER. It turned out to be a very long day, 9 hours at the hospital ended with bad news.  I wont go into details or specifics, we are still learning what everything means.  We have more hardships to hurdle apparently, we are pushed everyday yet still we find time to sing a song, make a joke and count our blessings.

If you are reading this, I mentioned I wouldn't use this blog to complain about how hard things are so know it's not my intention with this entry.  This entry is to tell everyone, there is always light, there is always hope, there is always a reason (no matter how hard it might be to find it) to keep on smiling.

My wife and I smile every day even though we have real and reasonable fear; death, pain, stress and loss are just a part of the whole experience even if they seem like the whole. Be realistic, look at everything and don't focus on parts to the detriment of life!

Why I do not believe in Civil Unions!

Or rather, "Why I believe Civil Unions will save us all!"

OK, hot topic, barreling strait at it!

So I have had a problem with the current discussion over same-sex marriage.  To me it is really a viewpoint and perspective breakdown and seems simple but is currently over complicating political dialog so I wish to propose a simple, fair and reasonable solution.

If

• Their is a sepparation of church and state
• Marriage is defined by god/religion
• We want equal rights for all
• We don't want to see a repeat of Separate but Equal rights

Then

• Why are we having a discussion about something called same-sex marriage?
• Can we protect one subculture from another?
• Will we face up to inequality and fix it?
• Can we maintain that sacred separation of church and state?

YES!

Some religious/conservatives would like to ensure that a religious definition of marriage is constitutionally protected and that wording is friendly to their view point.  Whether State or Federally controlled these people are messing up our sacred church-state relationship by being shortsighted in their solution.

Some activists for equal rights have proposed the Civil Union as an alternative (which creeps me out). One subculture asking for the same rights as another subculture shouldn't even be a question but if it is, changing what you call it doesn't create equality, it hinders.  I understand those who argue "one step at a time" the solution put forth approaches, but lets call a duck a duck and a goose a goose.  Lets pretend for a moment those who are fighting for equal rights and those who are trying to protect their ideology are on the same side, because they should be.

I know there are several examples of cross over in the above but I don't want to be writing for the next several hours.

There should be no governmental definition or control over marriage! The legal rights of couples who wish to be recognized as "legally unified" should be governed over, we'll call that Civil Union and gender/sexuality isn't even a part of its process.  You and your chosen/significant other go to a governing office (such as a courthouse) and you file your legal documents and pay what ever fees are required and there is some form of governmental approval or not and you are recognized as a Civil Union or not.  

It protects the Church from the state as well!  The government doesn't get to tell the church who is married or not (cause right now you can go to a courthouse in most areas and get married rather than stand before the church).  If you want to be married you have to go before those people who should be governing such things, a religious/spiritual leader/organization.  Whether before or after or instead of or aside of,   you go before (and for simplicity and shortening my typing I am just going to say church instead of all the other words that could replace it) your church and you follow what ever guidelines they require and tithe in what ever way they require and the marriage is sanctified by them.

The short: Civil Unions are governmental and should fall under government over-site, Marriage is spiritual and should fall under spiritual over-site.  You can have one or the other or both, but keep the two separate and quit putting religion into legal structure and vice a versa.

Ask a minority in the south prior to the Civil Rights Act of 1964 how they feel about Separate but Equal solutions and then look at how you are trying to move forward.  No matter which side you are on, it is dirty and hurtful at some point unless you are looking at equality for the future!

New Beginings

Today was an odd morning, my routine has been disrupted and I find myself wanting to express myself. So with the help of a friend who posted on her blog and then made a comment on the facebooks that caught my attention I find myself following links and trails and here I am in the blogasphere posting my own ramblings.

While I doubt there will be many who read this it feels somehow important to me that I justify my position and explain who I am from my own perspectives.

• I am Ryan
• I am married to a wonderful and amazing woman, who is slowly dying of metastatic breast cancer and although she is fighting the process with vigor and a great attitude, the doctors inform us it is an eventuality.  This fact is a part of my life, it isn't hard or sad, it is life.  Its been a part of my reality since 2002 so it has become my norm and while I don't wish it on anyone, I am a realist and an optimist so I know when and how to find joy and happiness. Do not think I am sad (even if in the future I make comments regarding my sadness, those will more than likely be me just venting)
• I am currently a foster parent, my wife and I figured we didn't have enough stress in our lives so we took in my nephew while his parents get their "act" together.  He has been a blessing to our home for over a year now and while the bureaucracy of state organized child rearing can be burdensome, his best interests are always met and how could anyone complain about that?!
• My wife and I have owned and operated a Montessori school since 2001 we have staff and students a plenty, and of course all the stresses that come with such an enterprise.
• I believe in responsibility, public and personal.  A belief that shapes most of my philosophies and approaches toward life.  Whether political, spiritual or environmental, looking for fault or cause is only another way of saying who is responsible.
• I live in Oregon, locally I am a moderate, which makes me fairly liberal on a national level. but don't be surprised if I show a bent toward the conservative, just look at the bullet point above this one.
• I am an equalist, (my spellchecker tells me there is no such word).  I believe there are hot topics such as feminism, religion, race and anything the anti discrimination acts protect that seem to fuel themselves by segregating themselves into subcultures and while I understand purpose it appears to lack forward thinking, they are why we can not all just get along.  If everyone treated everyone with dignity and equality and stopped asking for or giving special recognition things would be a lot better off, again, I am not only an optimist but a realist as well so I can recognize purpose and appreciate maintained diversity.
• Ryan is a geek and a nerd, just ask anyone
• I am "chatty" I like to think I can talk to anyone about anything and even if I am not aware of subject manner I can nearly always follow and provide input to any conversation.  I also know when to keep my mouth shut... normally.  This bullet point could also be referred to as the "BS Factor"
• I am horrible in debate, not because I can not make informed arguments or because I am easily swayed, but because I tend to look an general pictures from as many angles as I can and thus I loose the ability to utilized specifics such as exact words, I see more of the inferred.  I don't like being locked into a position because it generally means an inability to change and learn.
• I am (or technically was) a Boy Scout and still try and act accordingly.

so don't take anything I might say personally without talking to me first, odds are if I offend it is a miscommunication on some part and I have failed to properly express myself.  however, if that fails then obviously you are wrong and need to change :)

no apologies (as of yet)

Ryan